1)
“Behold the lane I spoke of. Weapons out, everyone, if you have them. Act stern and calm, stern and calm. No use of ‘Sire’ or ‘Your Majesty’—or for that matter, calling me ‘lord’ or Chantratha ‘Mistress’ or lady—until we’re…#epic fantasy

— Ed Greenwood (@TheEdVerse) March 18, 2019

2)
…past the bridge by the mill.”
“Why?”
“Brigands. If they deem us valuable, or too weak a force, they’ll burst from cover and attack. As we’re carrying nothing much, and our mounts aren’t the best, they may leave us alone.”#epic fantasy 3)
“You seem to know these hypothetical brigands rather well.”
“They’re real, Elvar, not hypothetical.”
“Oh? So just how do you know about them, Wolf, if you never leave the Castle these days?”#epic fantasy

— Ed Greenwood (@TheEdVerse) March 18, 2019

4)
“Maps and spies, maps and spies. The intel basis for all sound governing policy.”#epic fantasy

— Ed Greenwood (@TheEdVerse) March 18, 2019

1)
“Lord Wolf! Lord Wolf! What was THAT?”
“The other Lord Wolf was fiddling with the dead man’s crown, blew himself up, and left just me.”
“Green haze…sparks in the air…the crown did that?”
“It had help. I pushed some of its…#epic fantasy

— Ed Greenwood (@TheEdVerse) February 12, 2019

2)
…buttons and muttered some of its inscriptions.”
“It has buttons?”
“Palonder, have you ever heard of an unbuttoned crown?”
“Er, no.”
“There you go, then. Now, pay attention. You wear crowns points up, like this.”
“I DO know…#epic fantasy 3)
…that, lord. Don’t patronize me.”
“Whyever not? It’s worked so well, all these years thus far. You’re still alive, and physically unmaimed to boot. Mentally twisted and as ignorant as yon door, but one can’t have everything.”#epic fantasy

— Ed Greenwood (@TheEdVerse) February 12, 2019

1)
“Nowhere!” the breathless Champion of the Realm panted grimly. “All three thousand and six—”
“SEVEN,” the Princess snapped. “Three thousand and SEVEN.”
“Pray pardon, Highness! Three thousand and seven rooms of the Castle…#epic fantasy

— Ed Greenwood (@TheEdVerse) November 3, 2018

3)
…Naughty Nalansae, with the aid of the Royal Wizard. It’s my morning to crossdress, and doing and undoing all those stays is so TIRESOME.”
…have been THOROUGHLY searched, and I regret to report that there’s no sign of the King. We fear the worst.”
“Oh? And what would that be?”
“Your MAJESTY! Where WERE you?”
“Right here, all along. Wearing the illusory image of…#epic fantasy “But—but this was the first room we asked in, before searching the entire CASTLE!! …#epic fantasy

— Ed Greenwood (@TheEdVerse) November 3, 2018

5)
When I burst in, asking, WHY ever didn’t you just say you were here?”
“What? And deprive you lot of a golden opportunity to rush around the place waving swords and yelling? After all, that’s what adventurers DO. …#epic fantasy “Don’t want you to get bored in this unprecedented era of peace and prosperity. The gods know *I* do, playing King every waking moment. I thought providing the entertainment was the LEAST I could do for you.”#epic fantasy

— Ed Greenwood (@TheEdVerse) November 3, 2018

1)
“Lord? Elvar? What’s that SCREAM?”
“Night wolf being devoured by a manyjaws, Palond. Go to SLEEP. We’re going to need much from you in the morning.”
“More than being both your cuddle-blankets?”
“Much more. Cook, decoy, scout…”#epic fantasy 2)
{Yawn} “Oh, stop, I’m tired already, just hearing it.”
“That’s the idea, Cuddles. Sleep, remember?”
“You’re a sick man, lord.”
“Save the compliments for our more ardent moments, Palond. You’ll need them then.”#epic fantasy

— Ed Greenwood (@TheEdVerse) March 3, 2019

Lycanthropy has regrettably ravaged all aboard
And we’re hunting for the cupboard where the moon is stored

— Ed Greenwood (@TheEdVerse) March 1, 2019

The bards busily of great triumphal victory scribed
In epic lays that will go unread by all the warriors who died

— Ed Greenwood (@TheEdVerse) March 1, 2019

The corrupt rule of this kingdom we must urgently correct
And so I shall into specific innards this little sword inject
I anticipate their owners will as usual object
But I fear their shrill but brief complaints I shall sadly neglect

— Ed Greenwood (@TheEdVerse) March 2, 2019

Cold and black was the wine
The last time the Queen and I dared to dine
As the blades of the King drew ever nearer
And as the bottom of the decanter so blue
Came at last clearly into view
Our mutual fates became clearer

— Ed Greenwood (@TheEdVerse) February 27, 2019

Above, the moon, below, the tomb
The ghosts softly smile tonight
And drift menacingly close in the gloom
Will I survive to see the morning light?

— Ed Greenwood (@TheEdVerse) February 28, 2019

As the prince fell dead to the ground
Sprawling in his blood beside you
It took no perception profound
To conclude that at last we were through
When your head rolled away from the rest of you
That’s when I finally, undeniably knew

— Ed Greenwood (@TheEdVerse) February 28, 2019

1)
“Banners yonder, lord and Sire! There!”
“Stop calling me that. Just say ‘Elvar.’ It’s one of my names.”
“YES, Sire. Er, Your Majesty. Er, Sire Elvar!”
{Sigh} “Never mind. Wolf, YOU never get stumbletongue.”#epic fantasy 2)
“Elvar, I’ve had YEARS of glib lying. He’ll get there.”
“Wolf, we haven’t GOT years. We’ll all be dead ere dusk, if he slips at the wrong moment.”
“That is, in fact, the life of everyone in this and every realm.”#epic fantasy

— Ed Greenwood (@TheEdVerse) February 27, 2019

It seems the Queen put her secret cult to bed
After the King found one too many a rotting severed head
Now all the cult mysteries silently fade into hiding, unsaid

— Ed Greenwood (@TheEdVerse) February 25, 2019

The dragon swooped down, all the heroes were eaten alive
Leaving just me, the quivering coward, alive
Useless and craven but fated to survive
Until next the dragon out of the sky shall dive

— Ed Greenwood (@TheEdVerse) February 26, 2019

The dire runes once more are, tumbling, cast
But forget not that we read them in light of the past
And so may be greatly mistaken
O’er who shall rise, and who shall be untimely taken

— Ed Greenwood (@TheEdVerse) February 27, 2019